Today is the day my 4 year old gets sedated for her MRI. All week long I have tried to find my calm. My Zen. Breathing is good. Cookies help.
A long time favorite book of ours is Zen Shorts by Jon Muth. It is filled with stories that really make us think and put things into perspective.
Yesterday, I heard a variation of one of the stories being told on the radio. It was the Scottish version (instead of Japanese). Amazing how universal some lessons are.
A Farmer and his son work their rocky land with one possession, their horse.
One day, while plowing the fields, the horse steps onto a beehive. The son runs in one direction, and the horse breaks free of the plow and runs away.
The son goes to the Father and says “This is very Bad Luck”. The Father simply looks at the son and says “Maybe”.
The next day the horse returns with another larger horse. The son is overjoyed. He turns to his Father and says “This is very Good Luck!”. The Father says “Maybe”.
The next day while trying to tame the wild horse, the son gets thrown off and breaks his leg. The son said to his Father “Oh this is very bad luck”. The Father says “Maybe”.
The next day an army officer tries to draft the young son into a war, but leaves disappointed after he sees the boy incapacitated.
The neighbors all come by and say “What good Luck”. The son turns to them and replies “Maybe”.
The whole point of this tale is that Bad Luck and Good Luck are intermingled. You never know what is around the corner.
I have tried to remind myself of this story and really just go with it.Take things as they come.
As I watched my youngest get anesthesia, cry in pain, and fall asleep rather violently, I wept uncontrollably. All bets were off. That’s my baby. Calm? What’s that?
It is really hard to remember to breathe in the heat of the moment. It is hard to be brave when you see your child so vulnerable.
I am writing this from the waiting room. I have found my calm again.
I am breathing. And eating cookies.
You never know what could be around the corner.